I’m a pastor and I often wish I could control the Force like a Jedi. Sometimes I even wish I could control the Force like a Sith but only when freshmen boys won’t go to bed.
What if your pastor was a Jedi?
These Aren’t the Droids You’re Looking For
If your pastor was a Jedi, how quickly would “These aren’t the droids you’re looking for” turn into “Apply this sermon and live your life differently”? I’ve listened to plenty of sermons in my life, nodded my head in agreement and then done absolutely nothing to apply what I learned. I agree with almost every sermon I hear but that agreement rarely turns into action. If your pastor could simply wave her fingers and get you to live out her message, she would do it in a heartbeat. If your pastor leaned toward the Dark Side, though, “Apply this sermon and live your life differently” would turn into “Tithe regularly and buy your pastor lunch this week”.
Most pastors wouldn’t have an opportunity to show off their lightsaber skills. Unless another church decided to do a very violent takeover or Google/Skynet attacked on a Sunday morning, most pastors would have to leave their lightsabers safely holstered. What they couldn’t do with their lightsabers, though, they’d more than make up for with their golf clubs. My pastor loves golf and has done his best to pass that love onto me. Even if he can’t get a whole round in, my pastor will just hit a bucket at the range to keep his game sharp. If he was a Jedi, though, he wouldn’t need to practice in order to play like a pro. He could simply apply his Jedi focus to his golf swing or use a Force push to sink a ball that lipped-out. Some might consider that cheating but the pastor could just wave his fingers and convince them that it wasn’t.
Most pastors fall into one of three uniforms.
Golfer: This pastor wears a lot of pleated pants, sweaters and polos. This is a good, distinguished looked for pastors and anyone playing the back nine at Augusta.
Trendy: This pastor wears designer jeans and button-up shirts with a lot of crazy designs. Their shirts either have flames to remind them that they’re working to save souls from hell or angels’ wings to remind them that they can’t do it alone.
Youth Pastor: This pastor wears sandals, cargo shorts and a shirt chosen according to this Venn diagram.
If your pastor was a Jedi, though, the uniform would be set and it would be simple. Your pastor’s closet would have a lot of neutral tones, natural fibers and flowing robes. Not only would that uniform be simple but it would also eliminate the need to rent costumes for the Nativity production.
Jedi were the defenders of peace and justice in their society. Ideally, pastors inspire their churches to influence the world around them for peace and justice. Jedi had the power of the Force but hopefully pastors rely on the much more powerful Holy Spirit.
Though it would be sweet to Force lightning a student for not paying attention.
How would your pastor be different if he or she was a Jedi?