Popular sporting events can always cause trouble for nerds. The day after the Dallas Mavericks beat the Miami Heat for the NBA Championship, nerds could find themselves at a loss in conversations about LeBron James, Dirk Nowitzki or the Larry O’Brien Trophy. To help nerds better understand the 2011 NBA Finals, here is a nerdy analysis.
LeBron James is Anakin Skywalker
Much like a young Anakin Skywalker, LeBron James has been given the nickname “The Chosen One”. When James first entered the NBA, everyone had visions of the second coming of Michael Jordan. James would be the one to bring balance back to the NBA; he was the soon-to-be superstar who would propel the NBA to new heights. However, much like Anakin Skywalker, LeBron James has yet to live up to the expectations. Instead of saving the NBA and becoming its poster child, James has become its greatest villain. James turned his back on his hometown team and went to the Dark Side of South Beach. And after losing the championship to Dallas, James still finds himself waiting for redemption, much like Darth Vader.
Jason Kidd is Gollum
Gollum had unusually long life and spent his time obsessing about a ring. Jason Kidd is 38, which is old for a basketball player, and was missing a championship ring from his career. Now, after winning the NBA Finals with Dallas, Kidd finally has his ring and can hold it and caress it and call it his precious. Most nerds don’t compete in regular athletic competition, but they still understand what it means to win. Whether that’s getting the most kills in Call of Duty or winning best Babylon 5 fanfic, nerds want to win. Jason Kidd wanted to win. He has had a hall of fame career and now, with a championship, that career is complete.
Dirk Nowitzki is David and Goliath
Dirk Nowitzki is a seven-foot tall German. On the court he dwarfs all of the other really tall basketball players. Literally, Dirk is a giant. He might not be as tall as Goliath was, but he’s a lot closer than me or any other nerds huddled over their Dungeon Master’s Guide. Interestingly enough, though, in these 2011 NBA Finals Dirk wasn’t only Goliath he was also David. Five years ago the Heat beat the Mavericks to win the NBA Championship. This year, Dirk and the Dallas Mavericks were underdogs coming into the series. Like David walking out onto the battlefield outmatched in every way, the giant Dirk was trying to slay another giant, which he did.
For anyone who watched any of the Finals, it was a great series. Game 2 was one of the most exciting basketball games I’ve ever seen, with Dallas coming back from a 15-point deficit in about seven minutes. For those nerds who didn’t watch the Finals, though, and had no idea they were going on, hopefully the above talking points can provide a little knowledge to make those water cooler conversations a little easier.
Were you excited to see the Dallas Mavericks defeat the Miami Heat?
Awesome read! Thanks, what a refreshing and well-written article. I’m a German who supports Dirk, but one who has no idea about the NBA in general.
Would have liked to hear more about the Larry O’Brien Trophy though.
The Larry O’Brien Trophy is named after the former commissioner. I’m not that smart. I learned it from Wikipedia.