I’ve only been a father for 15 days. I don’t have it figure out yet. Most of my time as a father has been spent changing diapers and taking care of Alycia as she recovers from her C-section. My father was a good father and I’ve known plenty of good fathers. I don’t know if I have enough time invested at this point, though, to say that I am a good father.
Some people, though, have set the bar really low for what makes a good father. Yesterday I took Alycia to her doctor’s appointment and as we were leaving Clara needed her diaper changed. So while Alycia was making another appointment I went into the bathroom and changed Clara’s diaper. The receptionist was so impressed that I would change Clara’s diaper; she thought that I was a good father.
What did she expect me to do? Did she think that I would be out getting drunk with the boys at 11:30 in the morning on Cinco de Mayo? Did she think that I would be sitting at my office 70 hours a week making enough money to buy a sports car that would be off limits to Clara?
Years of uninterested and incapable fathers on television have led us to lower the bar for what makes a good father. Tim Taylor, Homer Simpson and Al Bundy have done a disservice to fathers everywhere. They have set the expectations so low that fathers don’t feel like they have to do much in order to be a good father.
We shouldn’t allow the expectations of a good father to be set by television. The Bible tells us that good fathers love their wives, don’t exasperate their children and train them to follow the Lord. They should also strive to place the needs of others above their own, which includes their children.
So while I appreciate the receptionist thinking I’m a good father for changing Clara’s diaper, I want to do more. I want to do everything I can for Clara while also caring as best I can for Alycia. That’s definitely more difficult than hanging out at a bar with my friends, but it will hopefully lead to a healthier and more well adjusted daughter.
What do you think makes a good father?
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