Last night I tweeted this:
The worst part about blogging on a daily basis is not having a single word written at 9:00.
— Scott Higa (@ScottHiga) December 2, 2016
There were literally no external forces pushing me to write and post something yet, nonetheless, I felt compelled to do it. I’m 10 posts away from wrapping up my sixth year of The Christian Nerd. When I started this site back in 2011 I had no idea how committed I would be to it. I had tried blogging before, but had trouble finding any sort of regular rhythm. I’m proud of my little corner of the Internet. My posts may not always be that great, but for six years there has been a post almost every day.
So I’m compelled to write every day because of something inside me. It’s partially a desire to share my thoughts, to connect with you all and to see how much further I can go. I’ve never really thought about ending The Christian Nerd; perhaps it will meet its demise when I stop caring about Star Wars and The Marvel Cinematic Universe.
We wake up, go to work, go to school, invest in relationships, play video games, make food, watch sports, watch Netflix and create something all because we’re compelled by something. The desire to make money compels us to go to work. The desire to entertain ourselves compels us to watch Netflix. The desire to belong compels us to form relationships.
Sometimes, though, we don’t really understand what compels us.
Earlier this week I went to a high school choir concert. When I was a youth pastor this was a regular occurrence; I was compelled because I saw it as part of my job. I’m no longer a youth pastor, but I still found myself sitting in a high school auditorium. I was at the concert supporting my friend who teaches choir at the school. As I left my wife and daughter to drive 30 minutes to hear Christmas songs sung by teenagers, I wondered why I was doing it. The more I thought about it, I realized I was compelled by friendship, by wanting to support someone who matters to me.
All of our actions and choices are compelled by something, including our desire to live like Jesus and be obedient to God. When I was younger my desire to be a good boy compelled me to be obedient to God. Sadly, now that I’m older, I’m pretty much compelled by the same desire. I view God like the principal and as long as I don’t sin too much and spend enough time reading the Bible, then I won’t get called to his office.
I’d rather my desire to live like Jesus and be obedient to God was compelled by love and gratitude. God did so much for me in sending his Son to die on the cross for my sins; the least I can do is allow that to compel me to live my life for him. Not because I’m scared he’s going to shoot me with lightning like the Emperor or because I’m wracked with guilt, but simply because God’s love is so great and the life that Jesus offers is so compelling.
What compels you to live like Jesus?