#87 – Bored in Church

Sometimes church can be boring.

I went to a wonderful service this weekend that celebrated what God was doing in the lives of his people. It was a wonderful service but it was also a very long service.

Here are some ways to keep yourself entertained when a church service runs a little long.

Test Your Nerd Knowledge

Nerdiness is like a muscle: it needs to be worked out. There’s no way to maintain an encyclopedic knowledge of Harry Potter without a little exercise. So when the sermon begins its seventh point why not give yourself a little quiz? For example, I like to keep my Star Trek knowledge sharp so I’ll often recite the credits from the opening of The Next Generation. This kind of challenge takes place within the quiet of the mind and won’t distract anybody around you with a longer attention span. Because of the contorted look on your face, people will think you’re wrestling with what it means to love your neighbor. They don’t need to know that you’re really trying to remember all nine members of the Fellowship.

Doodle

A lot of people tell me that drawing and doodling helps them listen. I don’t doubt them but it seems like a convenient excuse to doodle with impunity. So when the guest speaker steps up after a full-length sermon, treat your bulletin like your own personal canvas. Even if people look askance at you for drawing, after the service reassure them that it helps you listen. You can also tell them that you’re just following in the footsteps of Thomas Kinkade. It’s a little known fact that Kinkade’s first snowy and saccharine scenes were created on the back of a bulletin. (That’s not really a fact, little known or otherwise).

Read the Bible

I often have to sit through all three services at our church. By the third service my interest in the sermon is fairly low; God doesn’t need more than two chances to speak to me. My favorite activity during that third service is to read the Bible. Instead of completely disengaging from God, I just allow him to speak to me by different means. Even if the sermon is out of Luke and you’re reading in Jeremiah, no one’s going to fault you for spending time in God’s word. It’s best, though, not to spend all of your time in Song of Songs. Reading Song of Songs in church is like reading Cosmopolitan in line at the grocery store.

Obviously it’s best to pay attention in church and allow God to speak to you. Even though church can be boring, we need to recognize the amazing opportunity God gives us to enter into his presence and sit before his throne.

But if you’re facing a 12-point sermon, I think even God would understand checking out for points 5-9.

What do you do when bored in church?